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The Way You Live Your Life
by Jesse W. Love
Copyright 2005 Corporation
of the Regent of the Church of Celestine Light
All rights reserved.
When I was
in my early 20’s and newly married, my wife and I were invited
by some acquaintances, Stan & Carla, to travel from our home
near Seattle, to Portland, Oregon to go water skiing on the
Columbia River. Stan had a brother in Portland. We were going
to stay at his house and were really looking forward to an early
morning of sun, water and lots of fun.
We got a
late start for the 3 ½ hour drive. By 11:30 at night when we
stopped for gas, we were still 30 minutes out of Portland and
anxious to arrive and get some sleep before our big day of
recreation the coming morning. As we were piling back into the
car after a pit stop, my wife came out of the bathroom with an
elderly lady who was walking with a cane. My wife was
supporting her under her other arm. She led her back to her car
where the lady’s 95 year old mother was a passenger and
explained to us that the lady had some type of epileptic fit in
the bathroom but she seemed to be alright now.
I was
feeling pretty content about the good deed she had done and was
ready to get back on the road. But Stan had other ideas. He
squatted down outside the open car door and asked the elderly
lady who was sitting in the driver’s seat where they were
going. She said they were on their way to a family reunion at a
lodge near Mt. Hood. I figured that shouldn’t be a problem. It
was
11:30
at night, the traffic on the roads was very light and she
assured us she was completely recovered and able to drive.
But Stan
didn’t seem to take any of that in. It went completely over his
head. Without even consulting anyone else, he told the ladies
that it was still an hour and a half drive to their lodge and he
wanted to make sure they arrived safe and sound. He explained
that we were headed to his brother’s house in
Portland
and he would like me to drive their car and follow us there. We
would drop off our wives and then I would continue to drive them
to their lodge while he followed in his car to give me a ride
back.
I thought
this was a bit overreacting to the situation, especially as we
wouldn’t be getting back to his brothers house until well after
2 AM in the morning. But the elderly ladies both thought it was
a blessing from heaven and readily agreed to the plan, which we
followed through with to the delight of their worried family
members who met the ladies with great joy when we arrived at the
lodge in the mountains.
On the way
back to his brothers house, I asked Stan about his unhesitant
commitment to going the extra mile to help the elderly ladies
and told him frankly that on my own I would have bid them adieu
at the gas station and patted myself on the back for having
helped them out.
Stan said
he was sorry he hadn’t asked anyone else what they thought we
should do. He said that in his mind the only option was
bringing them safely to their destination and it didn’t even
occur to him that anyone would have thought differently.
I told
Stan that I really admired the example he set of doing good
deeds, even when it wasn’t easy or convenient. He was quiet for
a moment and then told me something profound that has stuck with
me all of these years. He said, “Jesse, a lot of people at my
church don’t think I’m a very good Christian because I’m not
real good at following all the little rules for good Christians
like showing up for church every Sunday. But I have always felt
that the actions you do, like what we did tonight, are far more
important than all the nitpicky things that you don’t do.”
Stan
opened my mind that night to a concept I hadn’t really
considered before. I had more opportunities to have that lesson
driven home as the years went on. We moved to the other
side of the country right after that trip. Though I only saw Stan
a couple of times after that weekend, I have always remembered
him and the example of nobility and selflessness he exhibited
that night and I have been a better, more enlightened person
because of it.
Another
time, I was traveling by myself on a cross country trip when I
ran out of gas in the middle-of-nowhere, New
Mexico.
I put the hood of my car up and stuck out my thumb to hitch a
ride to the nearest gas station, but many cars passed me by.
Finally, after about an hour in the hot sun, a dilapidated old
truck that seemed to be held together with bailing wire, pulled
to a stop behind me. A wrinkled, little man in jeans, a cowboy
hat and boots, got out and walked over to me, introducing
himself as Carlos. He asked me what the problem was and when I
told him I was out of gas, he went back to his truck, returned
with a 5 gallon can of gas and poured every last drop into my
empty tank.
I was very
grateful and happily offered Carlos $20.00 for his kindness. He
was almost affronted that I should do such a thing and told me
that I should just consider myself the latest link in a chain of
helpfulness. As he had helped me, he hoped I would remember
that and help someone else in need one day when I was in the
right place at the right time as he had been for me.
A chain of
reciprocating helpfulness; what a novel idea. Think of the
possibilities! Though I never had contact with
Carlos
again, I have emulated the example he set many times, as I know
numerous people I have helped have also done. So the chain of
goodness he initiated that day has grown and blossomed.
Someone
once said, “The only book of scripture someone may ever read is
you.” That’s a powerful statement, but think about it. For
many people whose lives you touch, that may literally be true.
They may never open up a book of scripture other than the book
of your life and the example they see in your actions. As they
say, “actions speak louder than words.” As others see your
faith, your enlightenment, your spirituality, manifested by the
life you live, they will be more inspired to do better with
their life, as I have been by Stan and
Carlos.
Others
will see your good light and be more inspired to follow your
example, than they would be by reading 10,000 words written in a
book. The words of sacred books only become meaningful after
people have seen with their own eyes the goodness of the actions
of people who live the words written in the books.
It’s not
just big actions that can have a positive effect on observers of
our life either. When I was 18, I joined the Coast Guard. My
first job was to get through a torturous boot camp on
Government
Island,
near Oakland, California. After all the new recruits off the
bus were split into companies of about 60 men, I quickly
surmised from observing the punishments being inflicted on
members of earlier companies that the only people that had a
chance not to have 8 weeks of hell were the Recruit Company
Commander (RCC) and the Assistant Recruit Company Commander (ARCC).
They
always chose the biggest guy to be the RCC. He was the enforcer
of discipline and would knock as many heads as necessary to keep
people in line. The ARCC was the person with organizational
skills that actually ran the company, decided who did what jobs,
called out the cadence while marching, made the nightly reports
to the base office and all the other interesting things. This
was the job I set my cap for.
I
approached the Chief, the Coast Guard senior enlisted man in
charge of our company, and made my case for why he should
appoint me ARCC. As nobody else made a request for the job, he
gave it to me.
I soon
found that I was sinking into a hole where I didn’t recognize
myself. I had to adopt the demeanor of all the other companies
ARCC’s in order to get my men to tow the line and do exactly as
they were ordered to do. Unfortunately, this involved swearing;
a LOT of swearing. At least one swear word every sentence.
Though I cringed a little at first when the words came out of my
mouth, it soon became automatic and I didn’t think about it too
much.
That was
just one of the things necessary to shape a divergent group of
young men of varying backgrounds, education levels and
inclinations into a unified force. But as the weeks passed on,
I found my own personality was changing to match my words. I
was becoming more dictatorial, coarser, more open to condoning
things like allowing a group of thugs to beat up misbehaving
recruits than my normal self, illuminated by the light of Yeshua
would have allowed.
I kept
reminding myself that I was just doing what was necessary to get
through these tough 8 weeks. Then after 6 weeks of boot camp, I
read a simple quote from Spencer Kimball that changed my outlook
completely. Mr. Kimball equated that, “swearing was the effort
of a feeble mind to express itself forcibly”. At first, I was
offended and scoffed at the accusation. Then I defended myself
by asserting that swearing was the only common language everyone
in my company understood. And besides, swear words were the
best adjectives one could employ in certain situations.
Then I
took a deep breath and admitted that Mr. Kimball was correct.
In truth, swearing was just a rudimentary way of communicating
something forcibly. Moreover, a person of quality could
certainly find a more refined but equally effective way of
expressing the same sentiments. The realization hit me so hard
that I resolved to swear no more from that day on at any man in
my company.
Unfortunately, I soon discovered that without swearing, people
stopped obeying my commands! They thought I had gone soft. I
went to the Chief and tried to resign as ARCC but he refused to
let me. He told me I either better get my foul mouth back and
keep my company in line or my life was going to get fouler than
I could even imagine from the punishments that I would have for
letting him down. But I couldn’t do it. I had come to a
realization of a truth that now was a part of every fiber of my
being. No matter what the consequences, I could not be false to
myself.
That night
I called a meeting just before our company retired. I told the
men the whole story, told them I wasn’t going to swear at them
any more, but for their own pride and the choice of better
schools and duty stations when boot camp was over, everyone
needed, by their own decision and commitment, to be part of the
best company in camp. I challenged them to make our final 2
weeks outstanding. Though some laughed and made fun of me at
first, by the end of my little speech, most seemed to appreciate
my sincerity and agreed to push themselves, to work as a team
and to be the best “darn” company in camp!
And we
were! Our efforts included setting a new camp record for the 5
man team obstacle course. Years later I ran into one of those
men and after reminiscing about old times, he told me I’d be
proud of him because ever since that day he had consciously
caught himself whenever he was about to gratuitously swear. He
said he still did from time to time, but much less than before
and then only when nothing but a swear word would do!
Yes, we
are the only book of scripture many people will ever read. The
example of our lives can and does have far more impact for
better or worse on other people than the volumes of words we can
write, preach or say. As I’ve looked at the many great people
that have inspired me by their example, beginning with the
wonderful examples of life and love given to me by my parents, I
have realized that though big events can be momentous, it is the
everyday little things of life, a kind word, a helpful act, a
quiet stand for that which is right and good, that add up to
make exemplary lives that are inspiring and worth emulating;
lives that are worthy of the immense love given to us by our
Father and Mother in heaven, and by Yeshua, their only begotten
son, who has shown us by his life and teachings how to be
Children of Light.
I heard a
little poem once that still reminds me each day to reach for the
best in myself. I don’t know who originally composed it but I
hope it inspires you as much as it does me.
"You never
know when someone may catch a dream from you.
You never
know when a little word or something you may do,
may open
up the windows of a mind that seeks the light.
The way
you live may not matter at all,
but you
never know-it might."
I testify
to you that the way you live does matter. It matters to your
children, it matters to your parents, it matters to everyone
whose life you touch, and it matters to God. And I hope and pray
that it will always matter to you.
We invite any minister who would like to
submit a sermon to be considered for publication on this site to
please send it to:
sermons@celestinelight.org
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